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30 Rock

Liz Lemon is head-writer for "The Girlie Show". The relationship between Liz and her boss Jack Donaghy is, uh, well let's say, somewhat peculiar...

Jack Donaghy: "I want you on this, Lemon. Those jokes you wrote for my Mitt Romney fund raiser, they were top-notch."
Liz Lemon: "Those weren't jokes! That was an appeal for a return to common sense and decency."
Jack Donaghy: "Well, they got big laughs."

The Addams Family

Daughter Wednesday is trying to convince Lurch to attend the Butlers' Ball...

Wednesday: "It'll be fun."
Lurch: "I like being miserable."
Wednesday: "You might find a nice girl to be miserable with!"

The Big Bang Theory

Who's to say that theoretical physicists have no sense of humour?

Barry Kripke: "Heeey Hofstadter!"
Leonard Hofstadter: "Hi Kripke."
Barry Kripke: "Heard about your latest anti-proton decay experiment. Twenty thousand data ones and no statistically significant results. Very impressive!"

Howard Wolowitz: "What a jerk!"
Raj Koothrappali: "Don't feel bad Leonard. Negative results are still results."
Howard Wolowitz: "Even twenty thousand of them."

Community

Community college has never been this much fun!

Entourage

According to insiders, this is a frighteningly accurate representation of nowadays Hollywood.

Hollywood agent Ari Gold: "The next one after 'Queens Boulevard' is a studio picture. I'm talking franchise, baby! We'll get you the lunchbox. And an action figure with a monster cock."
Movie star Vincent Chase: "It's definitely tempting."
Ari Gold: "I love you!"

Horizon (BBC)

Especially recommended for bloated, overconfident egos...

About asteroids: "It is only a matter of time before the Earth is hit again."
About climate change: "A growing number of experts fear Britain could be heading for a climate like Alaska."
About 'freak waves': "These are not tsunamis or tidal waves, but huge breaking walls of water that come out of the blue. Waves the height of an office block."
And about super volcanoes: "Only a handful exist in the world, but when one erupts, it will be unlike any volcano we have ever witnessed."

The Simpsons

Homer often gets himself into trouble, and most of the time without realizing it. This is the rare exception to the rule.

Homer: "I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me Superman!"

Star Trek Enterprise

Dr. Phlox: "It's unethical to harm a patient. However, I can inflict as much pain as I like."

Star Trek Voyager

B'Elanna Torres: "The Borg wouldn't know fun if they assimilated an amusement park."

Third Rock from the Sun

Sally: "Did you loose weight?"
Dick: "No, even better. I bought bigger pants!"

Alien (Ridley Scott, 1979)

Meet the 'face hugger' and 'chest burster'.

Almost famous (Cameron Crowe, 2000)

15-year-old William Miller (Patrick Fugit) is given the chance to write a story for Rolling Stone Magazine about an up-and-coming rock band. He starts his article with: "I'm flying high over Tupelo Mississippi with America's hottest band, and we're all about to die..."

Bend it like Beckham (Gurinder Chadha, 2002)

"Anyone can cook Aloo Gobi (a vegetarian cuisine dish made with potatoes and cauliflower), but who can bend a ball like Beckham?"

The Big Lebowski (Joel Coen, 1998)

I counted 267 times the word "fuck" and heard Jeff 'The Dude' Lebowski, 'the laziest man of Los Angeles County', say "man!" 144 times.

Bladerunner (Ridley Scott, 1982)

Rick Deckard: "I have had people walk out on me before, but not when I was being so charming."

The Dark Knight (Christopher Nolan, 2008)

The first Batman film without the word "Batman" in the title. And with an unforgettable Heath 'The Joker' Ledger: "The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules!"

Exit through the Gift Shop (Banksy, 2010)

Banksy: "Eeeh, you know... It was at that point that I realized that maybe Thierry wasn't actually a film maker, and he was maybe just someone with mental problems who happened to have a camera."

Fargo (Joel Coen, 1996)

In almost every Coen Brothers' film Steve Buscemi dies ingloriously. All that remains of Steve in this film is the lower part of one of his legs.

The Frighteners (Peter Jackson, 1996)

Judge to Frank Bannister: "Give it up, Frank! Death ain't no way to make a living!"

Ghost World (Terry Zwigoff, 2001)

After finishing high school Rebecca starts working in a coffee shop.

Enid: "How can you stand all these assholes?"
Rebecca: "Some people are ok, but mostly I just feel like poisoning everybody."

Enid: "Well, at least the wheelchairguy is entertaining."
Rebecca: "He doesn't really need that wheelchair. He's just totally lazy."

Enid: "That rules!"
Rebecca: "No, it really doesn't. You'll see, you get totally sick of all the creeps and losers and weirdos."

Enid: "But those are our people!"
Rebecca: "Yeah, well..."

Goodbye, Lenin! (Wolfgang Becker, 2003)

So close! Damn those @#$$%!! American capitalists!

High Fidelity (Stephen Frears, 2000)

Record store owner Rob Gordon about his staff: "I can't fire them. I hired these guys for three days a week and they just started showing up every day. That was four years ago."

Inception (Christopher Nolan, 2010)

Question: "What's the most resilient parasite?"
Answer: "An idea."

Juno (Jason Reitman, 2007)

Juno MacGuff (16) discovers she is pregnant and decides to give the baby up for adoption. Or as her stepmother eloquently puts it: "Somebody else is going to find a precious blessing from Jesus in this garbage dump of a situation."

Kick-Ass (Matthew Vaughn, 2010)

Dave Lizewski (superheroe without superpower): "So, how do I get a hold of you?"
Hit Girl (innocent looking, but extremely dangerous 11-year-old vigilante): "You just contact the mayor's office. He has a special signal he shines in the sky; it's in the shape of a giant cock."

The Life Aquatic (Wes Anderson, 2004)

In memory of Jacques-Yves Cousteau and with gratitude to the Cousteau Society, which was not involved in the making of this film.

Life of Brian (Terry Jones, 1979)

The cowards at EMI backed out when they believed the script to be 'blasphemous'. So I'd like to thank ex-Beatle George Harrison. No, not for his dull music, but for financing this great film. And for dialogues like...

Brian: "You have to be different!"
The mob: "Yes, we are all different!"
A little voice in the distance: "I'm not!"

Little Miss Sunshine (Jonathan Dayton en Valerie Faris, 2006)

Grand-daughter Olive: "Grandpa, am I pretty?"
Grandfather Edwin Hoover: "You are the most beautiful girl in the world."

Olive: "You're just saying that."
Grandfather: "No, I'm madly in love with you and it's not because of your brains or your personality."

Lost in Translation (Sofia Coppola, 2003)

I lived in Kyoto for two years, so I (almost) felt at home.

New Waterford Girl (Allan Moyle, 1999)

No, protagonist Liane Balaban looks like Natalie Portman (Padmé Amidala from Star Wars Episode 1, 2 and 3), but it's not her.

Office Space (Mike Judge, 1999)

My personal hero, Peter Gibbons: "It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care."

Rushmore (Wes Anderson, 1998)

Max Fischer (15) finally has found something that he and his pretty elementary school teacher Miss Cross have in common: "We both have dead people in our families."

Secretary (Steven Shainberg, 2002)

Dr. Twardon (Patrick Bauchau) summarizes the film like this: "Who's to say that love needs to be soft and gentle?"

The Simpsons Movie (David Silverman, 2007)

I'll let the tagline of this film speak for itself: "See our family! And feel better about yours."

Sin City (Frank Miller, 2005)

Blood, babes and dialogues like...
Ronnie: "Remember, we don't have to deliver every last inch of the man Brian!"
Brian: "You're right Ronnie. Lend us your knife..."

Star Trek: First Contact (Jonathan Frakes, 1996)

This is what a Dutch television guide had to say about this film... This is by far the best Star Trek film ever. The plot of the story is based on "The Best of Both Worlds". In that episode from "The Next Generation", captain Jean-Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise is tortured by the Borg, a cybernetically-enhanced race which forcibly assimilates other sentient species into its structure and hive-mind.

First Contact has grand special effects, and the story from director Frakes (commander William T. Riker) is intriguing and great fun. Even for non-Trekkies this film is hard to resist. Or as the Borg would say: "Resistance is futile."

Stupeur et tremblements (Alain Corneau, 2003)

OMG! I'm so glad that I never had to go to work in Japan...

This is Spinal Tap (Rob Reiner, 1984)

This pretentious ponderous collection of religious rock psalms is enough to prompt the question: "What day did the Lord create Spinal Tap, and couldn't he have rested on that day too?"

Les Triplettes de Belleville (Sylvain Chomet, 2003)

I don't know why, but I just love animation!